Helping an Elder with Finances

Caring for an older family member often leads to support with finances. This can involve paying bills, making deposits, helping with savings, investments, tax preparations and other financial tasks. Like much of caregiving, the increase in involvement can be either a slow process or a sudden dive into full responsibility, depending on the circumstances.

What are basic firsts steps for Financial Support?

Establish a Financial Power of Attorney (POA)
Complete a Health Care Power of Attorney and Living Will (Advance Directives)
Notify financial institutions about POA status
Start the conversation about current finances
Offer to help with some aspect of finances
Involve 3rd party partners - Accountant, Financial Advisor, etc.
Keep a close eye on financial accounts and set up notifications and safeguards
Set up controlled access to cash and credit

A Financial Support Case Study

Hearing about the caregiving experiences of others in a similar situation can be helpful. When AARP’s Amy Goyer* started helping her father with finances it was in response to the high level of stress that she saw as he increasingly struggled with taxes and management of a property in another state. “My sister and I began helping him with some of these tasks, and bit by bit, I took over paying my parents’ bills. Eventually, I managed all of their financial matters.” What allowed this gradual progression was Amy’s thoughtful and respectful approach. First, she asked whether he would like some help and couched her support as an extension of her skills on the computer and the internet - a domain where he could comfortably acknowledge her competence. Because she was long distance, she helped her father set up paperless billing and made sure that there were alerts and notifications if unusual amounts of money were leaving his accounts. As a safeguard for money flow, she set up a separate checking account, moving enough funds each month to cover haircuts, dog care and other “spending money.” She also took the time to meet with her father’s accountant and financial planner to make sure that she understood the bigger picture of her parents’ finances.

However, before any of these steps could be taken, Amy and her father had set up a Power of Attorney document that gave her the legal ability to access her parent’s accounts and to make transactions. She understood that trying to bypass this step by just adding her name to bank accounts might cause complications and unintended consequences that she wanted to avoid.

Even with all her attention and effort, Amy discovered that her father had a “friend” who, over many years, siphoned off large amounts of money by appealing to her father’s status as a veteran and requesting money for a phony handicapped veterans organization. If she had not been in the financial loop, the cost of the scam might have been far more damaging.

Whatever your personal circumstances, be smart and take good care with your Estate Planning. Your thoughtful efforts will make an enormous difference for your loved ones. Remember that as you navigate all of life’s turns in the road, you can trust our legal team at Hillsborough Wills & Trusts to support you and your family as you Build Your Circle of Security.

*Goyer, Amy. “The Challenge of Managing My Parents’ Finances.” AARP, February 15, 2022.